Timelash

The Doctor and Peri are caught in a time corridor running out of the planet Karfel. The tunnel is part of a device called the Timelash, a unique device of execution that throws political enemies down the vortex into exile on other planets. When the TARDIS materializes on Karfel, Peri is taken prisoner to co-opt the Doctor into assisting the retrieval of an amulet that was lost down the Timelash along with a noblewoman of the governing council. The ruler of Karfel, the Borad, is having a hard time quelling a rebellion that is growing against him, but with the arrival of the Doctor, and more importantly of Peri, he sees the solution he has been waiting for, although for Peri it could be the start of a whole new set of problems.

Oh boy. Every season of Doctor Who has one story that is not as good as the rest, one that the majority of viewers will not feel as excited about. Timelash is not that story. For this season, that story was Attack of the Cybermen. Timelash isn't just "not as good" it's downright bad. Like horrible bad. Like CRAP bad.

How bad? It's visual effects are bad, starting with the Doctor and Peri strapping themselves to the TARDIS concole to navigate the Timelash. It's writing is bad, with dialogue that the actors seem to have trouble delivering, although to his credit, Colin Baker does a very good job apeing William Hartnell. The acting is bad, none of the characters are particularly memorable, Vena tends to look across the room from people when she speaks to them so you might think she is blind, Tekker (played by Paul Darrow) is just over the top as the Borad's bum-kissing Maylin, and the guy playing H.G. Wells (no joke, and no reason for it) just irritates.

The Borad doesn't really stack up very well as a baddie. He does all sorts of bad things like divert energy from hospitals for his own private projects, he kidnaps Peri and leaves her at the mercy of monsters living down cave tunnels, he shoots people with a device that accelerates their age until they collapse as a heap of old bones, and he deliverately provokes war with the snake-like Bandrils who share the star system with Karfel. His motivation? Look at the cover of the DVD. Half man, half monster. You'd be pissed too. To his credit, though, he has a fantastic voice - deep and mellow and menacing, and a booming laugh.

There's even a fun bit of continuity here; the third Doctor apparantly visited Karfel in the past, making such an impression that there was a mosaic of him painted on the wall (and then covered up) and the daughter of someone he met while there holds a locket with a picture of Jo Grant inside it. And Peri knows Jo to see her picture, suggesting she may have met her, or the Doctor's been showing the holiday snaps again.

There was too much to really not enjoy about Timelash. It reeks of a serial made towards the end of the season with the money running out, otherwise some more time and care would have been taken with the direction to at least salvage that much. I'm not sure why it's on DVD when so many better shows could be put out with fantastic extras, but my friend Mike suggested that it might be better to get some of the clunkers out of the way rather than saving them for last, which is what happened with the VHS range and they had to take 11 so-so titles and sell them in an unrelated box set. With Timelash on DVD, the last hold out for this season is the premiere itself, Attack of the Cybermen, the plan apparantly being to start selling complete seasons in boxes. I am going to get Timelash on DVD mind you - for the sake of completing my set. I'll give the extras package a chance, it could be redeeming, or maybe there will be a blunt and cutting commentary track to listen to. Or maybe Jay and I will just record our own.

NEXT EPISODE : REVELATION OF THE DALEKS